I know you are, but what am I?

Recently, I explored an advertisement about Energy Vampires.

It started with the question "What kind of empath are you?"And continued with free videos warning against the dangers of energy vampires, all around us.

 The videos described how awesome I (the empath) was, and how negative my association with energy vampires can be.

And the four helpful videos, doled out one by one, promised there would be answers to the question - Oh, what should I do? And maybe there were answers, but all I felt was a slimy nasty feeling that, by the very words of the speaker, could be attributed to energy vampires!

Now, having done a little exploring into the frustrating world of video workshops, I have to say, this is probably the formula the promotional department wanted. Put out hooks. Lead with promises. Mention the real answers in the very last video (which I didn't bother watching because the first two gave me huge feelings of inadequacy and victimhood.) Get people to buy the online video courses!

Which made me wonder - have we created a society of energy vampires? Or just - lets simplify it - of vampires?

Look at our ads, our billboards, the products out there. They create (or try to create) an audience by feeding our insecurities, driving the need for the new, taking away the things that always worked and saying they really weren't good enough.

But hey, if we have the cash, they have the cure. Promise.

Even the medical world is full of stop gaps and fear to keep us coming back, hat and money in hand.

I am a part of this cycle. As a retail person, as a healer, as a writer, I am attempting to connect with and respond to the pulse of the world, the ills and travails of society. I have the way for it all to be better. Well, for now. If you're like me.

So am I a vampire too?

Not the point. Maybe the point? Getting to the point...

First, we have all learned to be or to respond to vampires because that is the way our current society works.

But second, things are not as simple as vampire vs empath. There is no easy demarcation between a donor and a receiver. Because I think we all are a bit of both. It's called the exchange.

We crave the connection, the give and the take, the partnership. We want to receive, and in return we want to prove ourselves, be valued for what we have to offer. For who we are.

I guess the true vampire is one who takes and never returns. A person who doesn't care what happens to the "host," so long as she herself is filled. So that eases my mind a little.

I do accept there are people out there who are so void, they can only take from others. And there are people who are unwilling or unable to be part of the Universal exchange, so they just feed and feed, and desperately search for their next meal. And yes, much as I am working to change this reality, there are probably still people who feel absolutely nothing unless they are creating pain. No conscious, no connection.

And those videos are probably very helpful for a lot of people!

But I don't believe that it is a cut and dried matter of saying, if you are not an empath, you are a vampire. Or that if you feel better after being with people, you are a vampire.  Or - if you feel worse after being with other people, they are vampires. I think there is more to it. There is a lot more to it. It is NEVER just us or them, black or white.

And since we, the human race, are like ogres (who are like onions), we will continue to be searching for the next explanation, the next healing focus. The next person to teach; the next guru to learn from.The next give and the next take. The next level.

If you're like me, you're an empath. You're also a vampire. You're a wolf and you're a sheep. You give and you receive. You are part of the Universal Exchange. Which means, you're alive.

I hope you have a great day!
-Lila

I am a member of the Universal Exchange.
I receive and I give with ease and grace, beauty, compassion, and Happiness. - LEA

Today's Happiness Practice... do I Believe?

There was a meme on FB the other day - about how empaths need order, organization. So a messy space results, for the empath, in difficulty being productive.

I expect that works for a messy inbox also. The number of emails, papers, envelopes, sticky notes, documents can feel overwhelming and, if you're like me, can cause the overwhelming desire to go read a book. Behind a closed door. Preferably in a secluded forest glade no one knows about.

Which, in the end, adds to the pile of things to do.

This is something I have been struggling with - wait, reword - something I have been working on for a long time. The Time Management project, is what I've been calling it.

But it's not really Time Management. It's space management. It's information management. It's knowing what I have and what I need to know.

And here's the thing. EVERYTHING in my pile of things to accomplish this day/week/month/year is something I want to do! Something I have chosen, for the happiness of the Lila. Something I love to do.

But it turns out that loving to do something does not immediately confer a montage of productivity.

The interesting thing - I already have  system in place. I KNOW what is effective in helping me feel productive and competent in juggling all the hats I have in my toolbox. And how many times have I written: "one step at a time." "Practice the habit."

A lot. At least it feels that way to me.

So, we're back to practice. Just practice. The best way to figure out how I do something is to do that thing, and play with it, and make it mine.

And there's one more step to wanting to practice, if you're like me. Belief.

I need to practice believing that I can accomplish all this awesome stuff I want to do. Seeing myself doing it. Feeling myself do it. I can make all the pretty schedules and lists that I want. But do I see myself using them?

How does it feel to use them?
Is there a sense of overwhelming obligation when my day is full of to-do's?
Do I become disappointed if I don't get everything done?
Will I feel satisfaction or frustration as I work my way through the daily lists? Through the sorting? Through the work?

Do I believe I can do everything I want to do?

And, how do I believe I can best get it done?

As usual, the practice comes down to the truth of the moment. Allowing it to be what it is, but also believing in myself. That I will get into the flow that feels beautiful and fulfilling and magical.

Because there is magic in the most mundane things. After all, proper filing and rows of neat numbers are salve for the empathetic soul. Right?

Today I will practice believing in myself and my practice.

And I believe we will all have a great day!
-Lila