How does it get better than this?

I have been a writer for many, many years. I write a pretty consistent blog. I have self-published 3 fiction books, and had 3 book signings. I have read my work aloud; I have given it as gifts. I have enjoyed being a writer.

And all of that paled beside the joyous, even ecstatic, moment I had tonite, as a songwriter.

For tonite, in the middle of an interesting and energetic week, I walked into rehearsal for the Mile Hi Threshold Singers, and they greeted me with my song.

And it was so AWEsome. As in I am still full of Awe.

There have been moments of doubt. All writers have them, I expect. There are pieces I have posted, words I have published that I have since looked back on and thought, "What was I thinking?!"

There have also been pieces I have loved every time I reread them.

But the music.

I hear it a certain way in my head. And I know (well, I'm pretty sure) I have the right notes down on paper. But until the notes are sung by multiple voices (cuz, you know, 3 part harmony) I can't be absolutely sure I have really translated it really correctly.

And through the process of teaching the music, and people getting used to the harmonies and the words and the timing that seemed so clear, so necessary, to me; through the repetition and the introvertedness that makes leading a song a challenging experience; through trying to sing and connect and direct at the same time; I thought... well, there's something just not right with the song. Because I have chills when we sing "May Peace be With You." And I get tears in my eyes when we sing "Equanimity." And I could get lost in "Standing Stone." And I'm just not feeling that...

But today.

Oh today.

I was late to the rehearsal. We all knew I was going to be late because of a family event. So when I walked in the door and was greeted with "Lila!" I just grinned, and turned to shut the door.

And then they sang my song.
 As I wrote it.
 As a welcome.
 As a gift.

And I had chills. And I had tears. I wanted to dive into the middle of the circle and be wrapped in the music.  And I was so full of joy and delight, I probably jumped up and down and clapped my hands.

And I know I'm not really expressing how marvelous, how transcendent, the experience was (I am tearing up just thinking about it.) I probably need another song.

Happiness is being a song writer, because a song, oh a song is a gift that gives right back. Three fold.

So today I am grateful. To me for writing the song. To the choir for giving it back to me in beauty. To you, for witnessing this amazing day.

How does it get better than this? I am so looking forward to finding out!

"Thank you for the song. Thank you for the voices. Thank you for the love which carried me home." (from Welcome to the Song, by...

Lila (Songwriter!)