Wednesday, February 20, 2013
We practice our religions for moments like these, moments when we feel stifled and heaped upon, unloved and unnoticed, or stared at and ridiculed. We practice our religions to create the habit of faith, the motions through which to go, so we don’t have to make any other decisions at times of crisis.
It is easy to believe when your sun is shining and the music is playing and you’re dancing because everyone is dancing. These are moments when it is important to practice, to hone and refine your prayer skills, to perfect the words and learn the motions with your body. Work harder when it is easier. Build your fortress of belief phrase by phrase - I believe in, I believe in, I believe in. When the storm hits, your fortress is where you run to, automatically, to clutch the stuffed animals of fortitude and hide under the blankets of strength. And you won’t remember all the platitudes and yoga and deep breathing, the kneeling here and anointing there. You won’t even be searching for them. You’ll be looking for the hug of the angels’ and the comforting hand of the Deity. The more you’ve practiced, the easier it will be to find them.
Practice makes perfect, and the only person who can judge the perfection is the you at the moment of need. So practice your religion, whenever you remember, so that when you run screaming into your fortress, it will be warm and cozy, rejuvenating and comforting, and it will have a direct line to Whomever you need.
We practice our religions, because the sanity we save will be our own.
Sunday, February 17, 2013
Thurisaz R & Ehwaz
-Time to lower the shields and step into the flow
*great advice. what's the flow?
-I don't really know.
* but then how do you tell when to step? Where to go?
and drop my protection? just on your say so?
If you stay in your bubble, you never will grow.
If you don't plant the seeds, there's nothing to hoe.
If you never step up, you'll always be low.
So take a deep breath,
Open the door
Put a foot forward
Step onto the floor
Make yourself present
Keep asking for more
and before you know it, you will be the flow.
*Do you really think so?
-Oh, just go!
Friday, February 15, 2013
If you're like me, you've never felt suffering was necessary for art. Or for any form of success, for that matter. Sure, strength of character can be built out of a desire to leave an untenable situation, but such situations are not a necessary ingredient for success! Desire can be felt without despair; will power can be honed without helplessness.
But, if you're like me, despite the positivity you’ve learned at your father’s knee, regardless of the support and love and will power and faith, you’ve been sucked into the transitional vortex that has infected so many. It may have been easier for you than for those around you, or it came at a more convenient time, or you simply had more time to prepare. And, if you’re like me, you were grateful to have gotten off so easy. Comparatively. For you were floating were others were flailing.
But emotions do not measure trauma by events in others’ lives. Emotion is totally and completely and rightfully concerned with “Me!” And now that the shock is over, now that the clinging and making it work and the need for strength is passed. . . Well, if you’re like me, the breakdown has happened. Is happening. Will happen for the next little while. And you find yourself, somewhat to your astonishment, climbing out of your own personal pit of despair. You are forging your own path because the traditions, the patterns, the lessons of “the before” seem useless in the now. You are building your own tunnel through the chaotic energy around you.
And the light at the end actually seems to be the light of success. Dreams seem about to come true. Hard work is preparing to pay off. The Universe has finally set a delivery date for the order you placed many years ago and it doesn’t even have the grace to look sheepish about it.
The frustration of it all, the simple fact that you had to suffer before succeeding, is almost enough to make you turn back to the pit and wallow in the despair for a little while longer. How dare it? How dare the Universe go against the very core of your belief in self? Why now? Now of all times? Why not a year ago? Or even six months? Why now? Appreciation be blessed. You can take this success and. . .
. . .And. If you’re like me, now we come to the sticking point. Because, let’s face it, we have been working toward this moment, this light at the end of the tunnel, the peak at the top of the mountain, the credits at the end of the movie, for so very long. Our indignation may keep us warm, but it won’t keep us fed, and it certainly won’t fulfill our dreams. Our desires. Our success. Our art!
So. If you’re like me, if comes back, always, forever, to the art. To the dream. To the need to be (shrug) whatever it is we are. Cause if we don’t move toward that light now, we’ll just end up digging another tunnel.
So let’s take it now.
If you’re like me, it’s been a long hard road; harder than it should have been, harder than it ever had to be. And fear is raising it’s head, even as we reach for the physical symbol of our success. But if you’re like me, you’re gonna reach anyway. And you’re gonna grasp that trophy, that degree, that contract, that check, the keys or the clothes or the jewels with both hands. Because you are awesome and you did work hard and you deserve every good thing on which you can get your hands.
If you’re like me.
Sunday, February 3, 2013
Believe it, gentle beings; the rune for February is Sowelo - Success. While this Success is watery with tears (frustration, endurance, relief, gratitude), Sowelo is really about the fire. The Fire of belief. The Fire of determination. The Fire of sheer will-power. And then, the combustive Fire of change, as 1 small success starts the Success-ive chain. A Success-ion of Successes.
Welcome to the Success-ation.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Where is it?
Where is that special something? That perfect piece? That thing that was us? That thing that represents the bond between us? Where is that momento, that picture, that jewelry, that piece of clothing that shows ME in her life? Not you, not him, just me. Where is my specialness? Where is my secret, sacred, sweet and unique moment, the thing only we two shared?
Where is it?