Wednesday, August 31, 2016

LIR 083016 - Gebo & OthilaR

It's not about fairness, in nature. It's about balance.

Energy is constantly exchanged, giving and receiving, ebbing and flowing, being and being, through each change and transformation in the cycle of existence.

Energy out leaves room for energy in.

The exchange is not in the gifts or the product, but in the effort. Your best deserves my best.

May each day be your best day!

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Enlightenment is Awesome, my ass! (and various other body parts)

Actually, this post isn't about my derriere. Of all the body perceptions I have, my butt is not something I ever focused on changing. It was never too short or too big. It never failed to function. It always cushioned me nicely when sitting, and...

... well, I'm trying to find a light-hearted way to comment on the various substances humans process, and how we do so, but it's just too early to talk about it. And too taboo.

But that is the point of this post. Taboos. and Bodies. And what I really think about mine.

I wrote a whole stream of meandering yesterday, which I did not post, describing how difficult it was for me to accept my body. MY body. My favorite part is this...

"I strove to be better at activities. At actually physically being active.
I wanted to be thinner. Prettier. To eat less.
I wanted to dance better. and sing better. And be able to manipulate my body like gymnasts.
I wanted to be light and airy. And slender and willowy. And long and lean.
Perhaps like a unicorn, yes? With a glorious, multicolored mane and such a lightness of being!"

I FEEL myself as 5'6", lean and graceful, every hair exactly where I placed it, pressed and polished.

And yet, in the mirror, I see myself as frumpy and short and round, and I rarely iron, and I'm messy, and I need a five minute break after a two minute dance.

"Frankly, I am at the stage where I would stand up and point dramatically to the witness stand and proclaim, "My body betrayed me!""

Well, I was at that stage yesterday morning. Obviously, being the awesome and amazing Do It Yourself Improvement Advanced Practitioner that I am (can you read that 10 times fast?, ) I instead started using tools suggested by my path partner.

Every morning for at least a week, I am finding 5 things about my body for which I am grateful. (And yes, that took a while, yesterday, because often I would follow it up with, "Yeah, but...")

And I listened to Dain Heer, a practitioner of Access Consciousness - which is, it turns out, a healing modality that's right up the Happiness Alley.

And the tool I focused on, all of yesterday, was the phrase "Who does this belong to?"
Instead of going into the long explanation of it, I shall post the link to his quick (8 mins) video discussing this tool. LINK

So, I spent a good long time yesterday weighing hunger, exhaustion, annoyance, tension, and expectations against the phrase "Who does this belong to?"

I did combine it with my own personal version of releasing resistance (workshop tonite!) and a lovely visual of chucking unneeded stuff out of the mental attic.

By the time I went to bed, I was so light! Like I'd taken a muscle relaxant.

Of course, this morning I was up and at it again. Judge judge judge. What if What if What if. Why can't I? Why won't I? Why aren't I?

Who does that belong to?
Who does THAT belong to?
WHO does that belong to?

There were some I was surprised weren't mine.

The body gratitude was easier.

And then, as I was sitting on the bed, contemplating my vision of being soft spoken and calm and proper (Julie Andrews) versus my actual bawdy and robust self (Bette Midler,) the automatic track of "Who does that belong to?" intersected with the willowy blonde vision.

And the world exploded.

Not me. Not ME. NOT ME!

It has nothing to do with me.

I am one with this body. With my body. 5'4". Amazing and versatile hair. A laugh that can fill a cathedral. Strong fingers for typing. Happy in my clothes, even when there's spaghetti sauce on my breast (and yes, the stain is always on the breast.) I love to dance, even if only for 2 minutes.

And I'll stand on my tiptoes to hug, because I do still feel so tall and expansive.

Yeah, my body, mind, and spirit have more exploring to do as I accept myself and what things my body CAN do. (And we're still discussing how much dark chocolate I REALLY need to consume in a day.) But when I look in the mirror, it won't be with the expectation of seeing something I never was.

Enlightenment is Awesome. I'm happy I am awesome enough to find it!

I hope you're having a great day!

Saturday, August 27, 2016

LIR 082416 - Raido & Kunos

Movement brings us possibilities. It is your movement that brought you to the choices you have now. Don't like them? Move again.
It doesn't have to be a big move... step to the left. Turn around. Go away and come back.
Movement is growth. Growth is change. Change is new possibilities. 
What else is possible?
I hope you have a great day!

Today's Happiness Practice - taking responsibility for my choices

Today I am going to take responsibility for my choices.
Which is such an easy thing when those choices feel good, and lead to doing my work with joy and passion.

But when my choices lead to me sitting on my bed, feeling sick and regretful, it's not so easy.

It's tempting to wallow in the discomfort, to dive deep into the regret, to start singing recriminations and beating my breast and wailing to the world the long stories of how I am so sad and so sorry and what I really wanted. And then there will be a nice little chorus of "If only, if only, if only...

But that's not how I work - using "work" in the fashion of making choices, and using my gifts, and practicing happiness. I don't do "if only". I don't beat myself up or spend time focusing on how I did it WRONG. I don't berate and judge and heap coal upon the head of my yesterday self.

 It doesn't change the choice or the actions. It doesn't change the consequence. And it certainly won't heal me or help me make a different choice next time.

So today I am going to take responsibility for my choices. Yup, I did that. I overindulged. Yes, today my happiness level is low. Yes, today's choices are affected by yesterday's choices.

So, next time I am offered that choice, how will I choose differently?

Each time I start to bemoan how I feel and start singing the "what I did wrong" song, I shall breath, accept that I made those choices, accept that these are the consequences, and Practice making a different choice next time.

Then I'm going to focus on today.

No judgment. No wallowing. Breathe. Accept. Replay with different choice. Move on.

And perhaps some gratitude practice thrown in there. That I know myself and have practiced happiness long enough that I am able to accept, replay, and move on.

Today I am practicing responsibility for my choices, and transforming recriminations to happiness. Because this is now. The future is unlimited. And happiness is my choice.

I hope you're having an excellent day!

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Today's Happiness Practice... I Want

Today I am going to say what I want, today.

I have been using the phrase "I would like..."

I would like to have a home base for my work. A store or an office or some place people can come into.

I would like to travel and give workshops.

I would like to drive a vehicle that feels the way my Tracker felt.

I would like.

I would like.

The thing is, that sounds like future tense. I would like.
I will eventually like.
Or maybe it's suppositional tense - if this happened, then I would like.

But neither of those are the truth of today, of this moment. I don't know what I would like tomorrow, though yeah, I expect it does involve health, abundance, and happiness. I know what I want today. I know what I want to feel today. I know what I want to manifest today. I know what I want to allow today.

I don't want to wait until tomorrow for a home base. I don't want to have a vehicle only if I accomplish specific tasks. I don't want to travel in the distant future.


And going with the flow, Universal time, it'll happen when it's right, etc and so forth - all that aside - now is when I want these things.

I know that I get what I ask for. Heck, I'm manifesting situations and opportunities I desperately yearned for 10, 20 years ago. And many of them I no longer want. Or I don't want Right Now.

Who knows if I'll still want a sporty, 4 wheel drive in 10 years? Or even 5? It's possible that next year I would like a personal driver. Or I would like a mini-copter. Or a transport beam.

But today? Today I want what I want today.

So today I am going to practice saying what I WANT today.

I hope you have a great day, today, if that's what you want.


Monday, August 22, 2016

Today's Happiness Practice... asking the questions

Today I am going to practice asking the questions.

Actually, it's not THE questions... that sounds like there are only a few really vital and important questions. Which is judgmental and limiting.

The vital and important part is that questions are asked.
* Do I want to eat this?
* What do I want to wear?
* Do I like that?
* Why is the sky blue?

I admit - there is a lot of fear, concern? trepidation about this practice. Especially regarding food. What if my body says no to bagels and oatmeal and stir fry? What if it only says yes to Broccoli and mushrooms?

What if I don't want to walk or sing or write or admin or whatever the question of the moment is?

What if there is... gasp... dissension?!

Okay, first, what if there is?  Perhaps I've been doing or consuming something that really disagrees with myself? No judgment, remember?

And second, this practice today isn't so much about the answers - though I do hope there is a yes somewhere in the eating, because, you know, FOOD! But by taking a minute and asking the question, I allow myself to act instead of react. I am more aware of my truths. I am more connected to me.

Besides, do I really trust myself that little? I know that purple brings happiness because I love the way I feel whenever I see the color. I know I become giddy when I read Tanya Huff. I know drinking tea is delightful.

And I also know that just because I liked something yesterday, that doesn't mean I want anything to do with it today.

So, today I am going to practice asking questions. Giving myself, and hopefully everyone I interact with, the space to be consensual about everything.

Would you like to have a great day?

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

LIR 61716 - No Rune

Awesome! Once more, the main focus for the week is to be ourselves, as fully and beautifully as we can.

This means we practice breathing, choosing, allowing, accepting, doing, and dealing with our own happiness in mind. We know what works for us, and if we're not sure, then we shall simply try something and see what happens.

We are the center of our universes.

I hope you have a great week!

Sunday, August 14, 2016

Today's Happiness Practice... (it'll come to me in just a minute)...

Today I am going to Practice - well, goodness. What do I need to practice? I don't know.

This week has shown I have become skilled at focusing, breathing, being in the moment. Allowing others to be as they are. There are still some habits and reactions that I am transforming but those might not even apply today.

In fact, it feels much more beneficial to not try and figure out what tools I might need to employ today.

Instead of anticipating or preparing for moments of learning, instead of prejudging what might be unhappy, instead of EXPECTING to need to practice something, I shall simply, well...

Goodness, what shall I do?

Experience. Breathe. Sing. Type. Talk.

(But, wails a part of me, I don't know how to label that, how to express that in this here blog!)

I suppose it is BEING. Being the best Lila I can be. Being happy.

But it feels both simpler and more complex than that.

Like Love.

Like Acceptance.

Like Connection to the Universe and all the marvelous awesome beings in it.

Like being One with Glorious Omnipotent Divine.

Ah. It's an action verb.

Today, I AM.

I hope you have a great day!

Thursday, August 11, 2016

How does it get better than this?

I have been a writer for many, many years. I write a pretty consistent blog. I have self-published 3 fiction books, and had 3 book signings. I have read my work aloud; I have given it as gifts. I have enjoyed being a writer.

And all of that paled beside the joyous, even ecstatic, moment I had tonite, as a songwriter.

For tonite, in the middle of an interesting and energetic week, I walked into rehearsal for the Mile Hi Threshold Singers, and they greeted me with my song.

And it was so AWEsome. As in I am still full of Awe.

There have been moments of doubt. All writers have them, I expect. There are pieces I have posted, words I have published that I have since looked back on and thought, "What was I thinking?!"

There have also been pieces I have loved every time I reread them.

But the music.

I hear it a certain way in my head. And I know (well, I'm pretty sure) I have the right notes down on paper. But until the notes are sung by multiple voices (cuz, you know, 3 part harmony) I can't be absolutely sure I have really translated it really correctly.

And through the process of teaching the music, and people getting used to the harmonies and the words and the timing that seemed so clear, so necessary, to me; through the repetition and the introvertedness that makes leading a song a challenging experience; through trying to sing and connect and direct at the same time; I thought... well, there's something just not right with the song. Because I have chills when we sing "May Peace be With You." And I get tears in my eyes when we sing "Equanimity." And I could get lost in "Standing Stone." And I'm just not feeling that...

But today.

Oh today.

I was late to the rehearsal. We all knew I was going to be late because of a family event. So when I walked in the door and was greeted with "Lila!" I just grinned, and turned to shut the door.

And then they sang my song.
 As I wrote it.
 As a welcome.
 As a gift.

And I had chills. And I had tears. I wanted to dive into the middle of the circle and be wrapped in the music.  And I was so full of joy and delight, I probably jumped up and down and clapped my hands.

And I know I'm not really expressing how marvelous, how transcendent, the experience was (I am tearing up just thinking about it.) I probably need another song.

Happiness is being a song writer, because a song, oh a song is a gift that gives right back. Three fold.

So today I am grateful. To me for writing the song. To the choir for giving it back to me in beauty. To you, for witnessing this amazing day.

How does it get better than this? I am so looking forward to finding out!

"Thank you for the song. Thank you for the voices. Thank you for the love which carried me home." (from Welcome to the Song, by...

Lila (Songwriter!)

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

LIR 081016 -Eihwaz

Eihwaz is the Rune of the hunter - a being who is successful at being active in multiple worlds. She is the bridge, quiet, observant. She is a valued member of all worlds, but her reality is bigger than just one.

We can expand our reality, to include any world we wish. But know that when your horizons widen, your truths change.

I hope you have a great day!

Monday, August 8, 2016

Soapbox of Perception - an unCivil war in which All of GOD's fires matter

Okay. Where to start?    (audio version)

Here are the issues rolling around in my brain.
* All Lives Matter
* A Country Divided
* The political monopoly
Let's see if I can express myself in a fashion easy to follow.

"All Lives Matter" - the War of the Words:
      Black lives matter vs All lives matter has been equated to ignoring a burning house: "My house is on fire." "All houses matter."

That comparison makes no sense to me. A more accurate interpretation is someone saying: "My purple house is on fire - my purple house needs attention."

And someone else replying "There are many houses on fire. They all need attention."

Sometimes, I admit it, I wish it was just one set of people with a definitive physical characteristic who was being oppressed, profiled, mistreated, bullied, wrongfully accused, and willfully slain. It would be so much easier, then, to know who to protect, who to guard, and (presumably) who the bad guys were.

But that is not the reality.

It doesn't matter what shade your skin is, what shape your eyes are, what tax bracket or zip code you are slotted in, what your labor is, or what spiritual rules you follow. If you live upon this planet, you have probably been harmed a time or two.

And if you are feeling harmed, it can feel even more harmful to hear "Black lives matter." Because it implies that only people who belong to that specific group are worthy of mattering. Only their suffering is true suffering; only their deaths are true deaths. They are the only ones who deserve to be helped.

But we are not groups. We are not governments and churches and societies and political parties and corporations and races and cultures. We are people. Individual. Unique. Alone.

As a happiness practitioner, I accept that people feel the need to band together for or against something in order to feel like they can survive, but, Ladies and Gentlemen, it has not improved any situation yet. Because here we are.

A "Country Divided"- as in separated into MANY parts:

An FB poster cited Obama as the cause for this division - and I disagree. I expect the African Americans, the American Indians, the LGBT Community, the Muslims, and the Asians all have examples of division in our past. Of course the Women have theirs. And let's not forget the Jews, the Pagans, or the indentured poor.

We have been a species divided since one being perceived difference and decided that difference was bad.

I don't know that America was ever truly whole; our Forefathers and Foremothers (meaning the leaders) were simply united AGAINST something.

And so they manipulated and compromised and created a country where "All men are created equal." And men, in the English language, stands for all human beings. And eventually, a form of democracy was founded in which we had a representative of this country, chosen by a majority vote.

Through the process of that election, some 200 years later,  a Democratic President with dark skin was voted into office. Many who voted differently then chose to deride and insult the chosen head of their chosen country. They chose to behave as if the voices and opinions of over half the citizens didn't matter. In short, they chose to behave as if Democracy was no longer a viable form of government.

And I know that not all Democrats have black or brown skin. (And not all those with black or brown skin are Democrats.) So I don't know if the uncivil choices were about skin color, or political party, or the need for a scapegoat because it feels like we're in a downhill slide and we can't figure out how to stop it.

Maybe it's simply that people perceive our choices to be limited, and they only know how to behave based on what used to be.

It does feel like some people are trying to convince the rest of us that there are only two groups in America. National and Foreigners. Christians and non-Christians. Black and White. Us and Them. Democrats and Republicans. (Aren't there laws against monopolies? Oh, but since there's two, it's not really a monopoly. My bad!)

But, just like there isn't only one specific physical characteristic that is being oppressed, there aren't only two political options. There aren't only two options for anything. There is no Right and Wrong. There isn't even an Us and Them!

There is me and you and him and her and her and him and him and her and her and him and...

And we each have thoughts about what would work and what is right for Us All! But it's not right for us all, it's simply right for us each individually.

For me.

Which is what Democracy is supposed to be, I think. An agreement by all to live by the rules that the majority has chosen.

And no. These rules should not work against Blacks, homosexuals, foreigners, women, the Green party,  non-Christians, or purple houses - whether or not they are on fire.

Neither should the rules favor them.

ALL lives matter.

All voices matter.

Each, individual person matters.

You matter.

I have pale, pinky white skin. I have blue eyes. I am female. I have a variety of medical challenges and a plethora of gifts and talents. I have a celtic american heritage; my current financial status is ambiguous; I identify with thespians and book worms and musicians and writers and spiritual leaders. I have theories about my past lives, but no proof. I have made decisions I am proud of, and ones that have helped me change.

But none of this is whoI AM.

I am Lila.

I am a one of a kind member of a diverse world.

And I matter.

Thank you, and I hope you have a great day!


Friday, August 5, 2016

(Yesterday's) Happiness Practice - Feeling the Wealth

Today I am going to practice playing with my wealth.

If you're like me, you're emerging into the possibilities of wealth. You can actually feel yourself living the life to which you'd like to be accustomed. But you're wavering a little on that fence of my reality and "Their" reality. (you know, the reality of "Them". "They". Society. The mob.)

You can almost believe, but when it doesn't work right away, you quickly revert to the "I told you so" of the nay-sayers.

Yesterday, I practiced being expansive in my work and expecting and allowing clients and money. And, if we go by Society's view of productivity, NOTHING HAPPENED.

Oh, except I received the message from the Universe that I need to be open to receiving. What?! But! I'd been open all friggin' day! And I had received absolutely bubcus!

At least, in the way of money.

I did make some great connections though, now that I review my day. And I practiced being open with a variety of people. And I did 5 readings! Hmm. Perspective.

But, sorry, off the track, the point of this point is the money part of it. the Wealth. My wealth.

Happily, I did my practice. I breathed. I recognized I was getting ready to head into a big self-doubt vortex, and I called my path partner, my coaching partner. And she reminded me:
 -  the Universe does allow manifestation, even though it's sense of time is different from mine (not exactly comforting, but yes, true.)
 - I have everything I need right now (Martha Beck).
 - I believe in my reality.  - and that was one I was grateful to remember. My belief. My connection with the Universe and my self.

Then we talked about what being wealthy felt like.
I knoLw what being happy feels like. Like peace and a light pouring through me. But what does being wealthy FEEL like to me?

Turns out it is a warm, sensuous flow, like floating in a current of the hot springs. So lovely.


This practice was helped yesterday with a quote from Abraham Hicks. "Your action has nothing to do with your abundance! Your abundance is a response to your vibration."

Abundance isn't frantically doing - it is BEING, growing, connecting.

I had a great day! I hope you do too.

Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Today's Happiness Practice... Using the Tools I have

Today I am going to practice using the tools I have.

And this breaks out into two parts, actually.

One part is doing the actual practice. Applying myself to the guidelines I think will work. Doing it the way I have set out for myself - because how will I know it works unless I do it that way?

And yes, I feel a little silly needing to follow a how-to on daily cleaning, self-care, and getting my work done. BUT...

If I don't keep track, if I don't write down, if I don't start with "getting the knife out of the drawer", I don't remember what works. Then I spend precious minutes trying to remember what comes next.

This is something I have long accepted about myself - but something I often forget. (ha ha.) No matter how intensely I wish to remember, regardless of how logical the steps are, if it's not written down, the next day I don't have a clue.

So, today I am going to PRACTICE doing it the way I have written down. I am going to take notes. I am going to be aware of what I like and what I don't. And I am going to accept that this is the most efficient way for me.

The Second part of using the tools I have is using ALL the tools I have to hand. I have 2 or 3 (or 12) different note taking possibilities in my phone. Some are more convenient than others AT SPECIFIC TIMES. Some work better than others for immediate recall.

I have different journaling options, different likes and dislikes on specific thought processes - but I also have a habit of not really reviewing things I've written on paper, as opposed to in the computer.

I have 3 different spaces I can use to work in. I have various options for exercising my body and relaxing my mind and feeding my soul.

 It's time to play with all my toys, and see what really works in each situation.

So today I am going to practice using all the tools I have, diligently, with attention to my details, my truths, my abilities.

What tools do you have?

I hope you have a great day!