Happiness Practice - Enhancing my Calm

I am amazing and awesome and wonderful and I DID it! Squeeeeee!

 And I am going to enhance my calm.

Old habits would include getting all jittery and excited and planning grand futures on this awesome feeling of success and connection.

And while old habits have brought me here (thank you, Lila) it is the changing of many of those habits that has brought me happiness.

And I don't like the jittery feeling. The breathlessness. The mind numbing plunge into infinite possibilities. It's distracting, and it makes it difficult to do simple things like make coffee, or put my shoes on.

I DO like feeling happy, excited, and awesome. And capable.

And when I take a deep breath, as I would when I'm stressed, and allow the feeling to just be the feeling; when I allow the joy and the accomplishment to be, to feel good and NORMAL, I can connect it to myself.

I can BE the person who does this kind of thing every day.

I am Lila. I am a Happiness Practitioner. I write, I sing, I coach and counsel and teach. I hug.
I create. It is amazing.

And I do it every day. Calm, focused, open and expansive, allowing, and happy. Every day.

So I take a deep breath. I feel the joy and the awesome and the happiness, but I release the jitters and the grandiose.

I enhance my calm.

And I go do it again.

I hope you're having a great day!
-Lila

Enlightenment is Awesome - and Every Day

The thing I find most amazing is how I work, how my brain operates. How many times I have to run into something before it starts really sinking in.

Over and over I have come to the conclusion that the Happiness Practice is an every day thing. Partially because each day is different, and therefore the truth of each day is different. But also because in order to get really good at something, in order for something to become effortless, in order to BE the truth, you have to practice.

I have to practice.

Every day. Every minute of every day.

Whatever the mantra. Whatever the skill, whatever the tool. Whatever the situation. I have to practice.

So why is it there are still some skills that have yet to make my "Practice Every Day" list?

Specifically, manifesting.

Through this last year I have discussed visualizing - or Invisioning - and how it is an excellent tool for creating the future. I have allowed myself a new bed and a new couch through this tool. And even had some excellent interviews.

And yet, today, thanks to my path partner, I realized I am only using Invisioning as a special tool. When I know what I want. Or when I have a specific vision in mind. Or as a response to fear or anxiety.

I think it would serve me better, and I would become better at it, if I used it every day.
If every day I took a few minutes to see myself accomplishing my chosen tasks and being happy with everything that has happened.With everything that IS happening.
If every day I Invision myself being everything I want to be.
If every day I Invision the possibilities and allow myself to feel the strength of my Love and Acceptance and Uniqueness.

If Every day, as I go about my day, when I find myself in a frustrated thought or with a furrowed brow, I step back, and I breathe, and I Invision the desired state of being.

Wouldn't THAT create the reality I desire? Wouldn't that constant practice, daily focus, strengthen the muscles of belief and visualization and feeling and being until it is effortless? Wouldn't that bring me happiness?

Every day. Every moment.

Yes, I think so too,

Invisioning, visualizing, manifesting, praying, believing, whatever you call it. It's not just for those big moments. It's for every day.

Because we want to be happy, every single day.

I hope you have a great one! I Invision I will. 🌈
-Lila

Thank You for the Music

Today's happiness practice is, well, everything.

I am breathing.

I am reaching down and in, to connect with myself, calming the frantic Lila.

I am allowing energy to feed me; and I am allowing today to be a great day, instead of whining, grasping, demanding a great day.

I am practicing (really hard!) disciplining / training my cat from a place of connection instead of a place of blind rage (MY COMPUTER!).

 And I'm balancing the desire to take pictures of all his adorable stunts with the need to keep him from jumping up there EVER again.

I am moving forward, one step at a time, and not yelling at myself because I feel like I'm missing some vital step, or because I'm moving slowly because I'd much rather be...  Well, because I THINK I'd much rather be reading. 

The truth is (are you listening, Lila?) I am happier when I have accomplished things, whether it's Tai Chi or filing the in-box. And reading, much as I love it, is not accomplishing stuff in a way that brings me happiness. 

Though reading is still awesome. I am so grateful to Tanya Huff, JD Robb, Rachel Neumeier, Robin McKinley, Sharon Shinn, Terry Pratchett, Lois McMaster Bujold - My go-to people when I need inspiration and relaxation in one sitting.

I am practicing gratitude.

Oh, so much gratitude.

Because this morning, when I was coaching myself toward getting out of bed, connecting with the universe and floating on the snuggly warmth of "Just one more minute", I realized there was a song in my head. 

This is not unusual.

But this song was not one I have been trying to write, nor one I had been practicing, nor one I had been listening to, nor even one of those annoying ear worm ones you wish to blast out of existence.

This is a song I had never heard before.

Some soft, female voice was singing "You are wonderful. You are wonderful. You are wonderful."

Definately practicing gratitude.

And listening.

\And believing.

I am pretty wonderful. I am unique. I am one of a kind. There is no one like me, today, and there never will be again.

 I am the shining moment of possibilities - a baby's laugh, a first kiss, a sunrise and a sunset, the moon on the water, the cuteness of a young animal, the spark of an idea, the blank page, the empty stage.

I am the burnished moment of experience - a mother's smile, a father's pride, the conversation in a glance, the sigh of accomplishment, the weary joy of memories, the frost of winter, the grief of the last words written, the final curtain.

I am wonderful. It is an honor to be me.

Happily, I am not the only wonderful person in this world (that would be pretty lonely). 

You are unique. You are one of a kind. There is no one like you, today, and there never will be again. You are the shining moment of possibilities. 

You are the burnished moment of experience.

You are wonderful.

You are wonderful

You are wonderful.

We are wonderful.

And today is a great day!

-L

If you're life me... cycles of belief

If you're like me, last week was amazing. You felt the confidence gather and grow; ideas burst forth; you got out and did things and stayed in and did things and really connected with the world. Last week was what you want your reality to feel like almost every day! If you're like me.

And if you're like me, today you're sitting in a kind of daze because, well, totally awesome amazing you seems to have left the building and you're back to hanging out with anxious, uncertain you.

If you're like me, it's kind of pissing you off.

Happily, if you're like me, you have tools for this sort of situation. So you sit. Calmly. Instead of rushing around trying to fulfill the list of "maybe I shoulds."
You fix your favorite drink and you take heartburn medication, because in the spirit of celebration you may have eaten a little too much yesterday.
 You breath, deep into your diaphragm.
 You journal.
 You expand outside of the situation.
You think about taking the calming coaching voice in a throttling grip, ripping it like a weed from your mind, giving it a good flame throwing, and running around like a spastic kitten (is that redundant?) just for the feeling of getting things done and where the HECK is that awesome person from last week she would know what to do!

But you know giving into the treadmill / monkey mind / lizard brain / quantity before quality thought is not actually productive or even helpful, so you take a deeper breath.

And you let it out!

And you take a deeper breath.

And you feel the relaxation easing down over the feverish brain, settling like a comforting hand around the shoulders.

And that helps you take a deeper breath. And you settle into yourself.

And you realize your calm awesome amazing self is right there. Sitting with you. Waiting for the storm to pass. Secure in the knowledge that there are always going to be vortexes but we have the tools and we have the plans. We know, now, what it feels like to be happy. Amazing. Top of the world, ma!

And we know what we want. To feel like that. As much and as often as possible. Even if we're not sure what exactly we're going to be doing - work, play, relationship, experience wise - we know that in this place, in this space, in this awesome confident mind set, we can try anything.

We believe in ourselves.

If you're like me, you woke up a little concerned that the amazing being of last week was just a short term event. But it's not. It simply that living isn't static. Life cycles. Energy shifts. Things happen. And now that we've practiced with our awesome amazing self, it's time to test drive her or him in slightly more difficult terrain. All we have to do is stay connected with ourselves. (simple, right?)

I hope you have a great day, and plenty of reminders to breath deep!

-Lila

Today's Happiness Practice - Allowing it to be a good day

Today I am going to allow it to be a good day.

It's one of THOSE days - where I can't sleep, but don't want to get out of bed.

I have things to do and I'm ready (on time!) but I also feel disconnected, strange, even portentous about the day.

And I am fretting about the future - do I really want the kind of work that requires getting up with the sun?

And I am practicing allowing myself to be fully myself and feel all these disparate feelings of hope and frustration.

But that doesn't mean today has to be a draggy, grumbly, day. With all these feelings and explorations and trying stuff, today can be a great day! I just have to let.

Instead of peeking into the next hour and thinking, "oh, this is going to be so difficult. I don't wanna!" I can simply breathe deep, and allow it to be easy. Fun. Shiny.

I don't even have to expect it or force it to be a good day. I just have to allow it.

So today, I am going to allow it to be a good day. Perhaps even great!

And I hope you are allowing a great day also!

-Lila

Today's Happiness Practice - Feeling the job

Today I had a job interview, and the interviewer asked an excellent question - remembering a "best day" at work... what did you do? (Which meant, what helped make it feel like a best day?)

And for me, it wasn't just a day, but a month. A month where I worked at the things I loved, felt like I accomplished things, and succeeded at the goals I had given myself. And the "best-ness" was compounded as I did this every day; each day was better than the last because I was having a successful, productive day AGAIN.

Now, I don't know if I'm the best candidate for the job I interviewed for today. We could be a good fit, this job and I; or we could be like two violins playing in different keys.

There are enough possibilities that I am going to be open to the job, and curious to see if I'm hired.

But I am not going to visualize myself in this job.

Instead, I am going to "In-vision" (Meanderings - I can see clearly) myself having a job that results in a lot of best days. I am going to feel the success, the happiness, the hard work paying off, the giddy enjoyment of fulfilling goals.

Because, as my best friend just reminded me, if I can let go of what I think I want (from the limited perspective of what I can see) the Universe will provide me with what I really need.

Today, I am not going to feel myself in a specific job. I am going to feel myself doing work that brings me happiness.

I hope you're having a great day!
-Lila

I can see clearly now - or at least, clearer.

If you're like me, you believe in creating your own reality. And yet you find yourself sitting in silence, trying to figure out how to make that reality, well, real.

If you're like me, you've visualized and believed and practiced and been passionate, and yet you're STILL sitting, staring out the window, reviewing your actions and wondering where your happiness is.

If you're like me, you've done the books and the webinars and it feels like you have all the knowledge you need, but you just can't seem to build the bridge from desire to reality.

Happily, I just found another paving stone.

For years (yes, literally - since I was a teen) I have been practicing visualization. Seeing myself in this situation or that, winning scholarships, getting parts in plays, having book signings and going to dances. And for years my dreams have failed to manifest.

And yeah, I have given up time and time again.

And started up time and time again.

As a writer, and a believer in everything, my imagination is well honed. I can create marvelous scenarios in my mind. I can infuse them with a feeling of actuality. Characters in books are more real to me than people on the news.

And yet, here I still am, wondering what I have done wrong, wondering why I am "Undeserving" of the lifestyles I would like to try. Am I afraid? Is it not time, yet? Am I lazy? Am I really not that passionate about it?

Today's truth is, I haven't actually been visualizing myself where I want to be.

I haven't been visualizing MY SELF.

I haven't been seeing, feeling, being me.

In these grandiose dreams I have had for the future (travelling and writing and speaking and serving and being so very happy) the person playing the lead has been some bright, shiny witty soul with great hair and compassion for every being. Okay, yes, that could be me. But the tailored look, the dainty table manners, the soprano voice, the willowy figure moving easily and neatly through airport crowds... those are not me.

At all.

I like my sleeves to be pushed up, leaving my forearms bare.
I like my pants or skirts to be loose and at least a little flowy.
I rarely remember to iron.
I talk with my hands. I say "Um."
I often have to dig around in my bag, which I tend to overstuff.
I have a bawdy laugh, and I occupy space, even when I'm trying to give other people theirs.

If I'm going to see myself travelling, I need to really see MYSELF, with the inelegant flopping down into seats, dropping something onto the floor, feeling like everyone is staring at me because I'm taking too long to get my stuff onto the conveyor belt for the security check.

If I've going to see myself doing book signings, I need to see myself having those awkward moments where I and the store rep are trying to put each other at ease. And making the decision whether to write the same thing in everyone's book, or struggle to find something new. And drawing on my hand, accidentally. And being grateful to get back to the motel because sometimes it's difficult to be out among strange people.

If I'm going to see myself as a coach, I need to see the initial conversations with strangers, as we try to figure out if we're going to have a successful relationship. I need to see myself talking about the work I can do. I need to feel the way I fiddle with clothes, with hair. I need to acknowledge the pacing, and the way I sometimes stare intensely at people, because looking equals listening.

Instead of visualizing, I want to envision. Ha, or INvision. See myself, as I truly am, right now. Not some perfect action figure; not a character in a book titled "The Awesome Life of Lila." Me.

Glasses and wrinkled shirt and untamed hair and skin tags and laugh and hugs and enthusiasm and all.

If you're like me, it's time to put yourself, your real self, into the vision. Because the reality isn't in the perfect moment, it's in all the slow, uncertain steps it takes to get there.

I hope you're having a great day!
-Lila